Gerry Marsden, of Gerry and The Pacemakers, is not going to be tempted by any dockside "action". Not even Ludo, a game that was still widely available when I was a child, but not to the extent that anyone still knew how to play it. PS I spent a long time in consultation to find an appropriate euphemism for "sex worker" for this comic and I hope I made the right decision.
89 comments on “It’s like a disease”
Rabisch
To be honest. He has every reason to be afraid of Shelley. His mother teaches him very well. Unfortunately, Shelley is waaaay stronger than him.
Sean K.
I must admit, “fille de joi” is not one I’d heard before. After saying that, if Gerry still is worried about girls like her, I wonder what quality he is referring to. Maybe his ma warned him off gingers?
Alaric
Or maybe he doesn’t speak French?
G. T. Ogle
“Waterloo sunset” started playing in my brain
Phil Masters
…And one wonders precisely how much irony was deliberately loaded into that post.
PlasticInsect
Ludo may seem like a harmless game, but it can be a gateway to more dangerous things, like (gasp) pitch-and-toss!
Dean
I’ve hears it can lead to Trivial Pursuit, or even (shudder) Monopoly!
LenSessions
I don’t want to be “that guy” but isn’t it “fille de joie”?
Rob Cottingham
I just read it as Shelley’s not-entirely-up-to-l’Académie-Français-standards pronunciation.
Rob Cottingham
*Française
Je suis tellement mortifié.
destroyhistory
FIXED!
Jeremy Impson
Wait what did it say originally?
quinn
“filly goy”.
Joe King
He needs to take that ferry ‘cross the Mersey.
Rob Cottingham
The first time I heard this song was Frankie Goes to Hollywood’s cover. (Which is actually fairly serviceable, but it still feels a little shameful.)
Dr. Boots' List
Tsk tsk. Filth is what it is. Nothing but robots and Ludo women.
Dr. Boots' List
Best songs about local water features:
Ferry Cross the Mersey – Gerry & the Pacemakers
Dirty Water – The Standells
Tahquamenon Falls – Sufjan Stevens
River Euphrates – The Pixies
Am I missing any?
Richard
Cuyahoga – REM
Dr. Boots' List
An excellent selection!
FilmFan1971
I’m pretty sure there’s one about the Mississippi.
Joe King
Black Water
Joe King
Old Man River
Dr. Boots' List
Classic river songs!
Rei Malebario
The Broad Majestic Shannon – The Pogues
Rockaway Beach – The Ramones
Dr. Boots' List
I had not heard that Pogues song. I can never understand his lyrics, but I can easily imagine they are about the majesty of Ireland’s longest river.
I can’t imagine the Ramones ever touching the ocean. Salt water is murder on leather jackets.
SchadenfreudePersonified
“I can’t imagine the Ramones ever touching the ocean. Salt water is murder on leather jackets.”
LOL!
RiffRaff
Night Boat to Cairo by Madness?
Phil Masters
Echo Beach – Martha and the Muffins
An Der Schönen, Blauen Donau – Johann Strauss II & Franz von Gernerth
Walter Cooke
Also “You Sold the Cottage” by Martha and The Muffins!
Dr. Boots' List
Strauss was a populist. He knew what the people want! They want songs about rivers!
Albert Herring
A Great Northern River by the Unthanks
tangentially, Medway Wheelers by the Buff Medways
Rhinestone Cowboy
And anything by Terence Trent d’Arby.
Dr. Boots' List
“A Great Northern River” pshaw! Tell us which river, mesdames! Is that really too much to ask?
maarvarq
The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald?
Dr. Boots' List
It’s a boat song, albeit one of the best boat songs. For some reason it’s deeply important to me that this is a distinct category.
destroyhistory
Riverboat by Allen Toussaint/Van Dyke Parks/Robert Palmer etc?
Dr. Boots' List
There appear to be a great many songs about boats and significantly fewer specifically dedicated to the sub-oceanic bodies of water in which those boats travel. It’s truly a shame!
Erik
Waterloo Sunset. Tops all of the above.
Dr. Boots' List
A beautiful song, but it’s primarily about Waterloo station, with only a glancing reference to the “dirty old river”
Chas
Does Surf City count? Is the Pacific Ocean considered a water feature?
Dr. Boots' List
If it were up to me I’d allow it, but the Local Water Feature Song Council feels that it’s a “slippery slope”.
Sean K.
Burn On by Randy Newman
Dr. Boots' List
It’s telling that there are multiple songs about the Cuyahoga, specifically because of the catching on fire thing. It would be nice to have some more positive river and lake songs. Songwriters of the world take note!
Charles Place
“Louisiana 1927” – also by Randy
Norah
Roll On Columbia – Woody Guthrie
Dr. Boots' List
This one is great. Woody really knew how to write a song about a river.
Urbane Gorilla
I would have suggested Roll On, Columbia if it hadn’t been done. Gotta recognize Woody.
Chris J. Zähller
Down by the River (Neil Young).
Dr. Boots' List
But which river, Neil? Which river?
I believe he’s trying to obscure the details to cover up his heinous crime. Though I suppose that if I shot my baby, I wouldn’t want to tell anyone else where it happened either.
Joe King
Shenandoah
Dr. Boots' List
I had always thought that song was about the valley, but now Wikipedia informs me that it might be about the Oneida chief Shenandoah, who the valley and river were named for. Now I don’t know what to believe!
Joe King
It’s about the river:
Oh Shenandoah,
I long to hear you,
Far away, you rolling river.
Oh Shenandoah,
Just to be near you,
Away, I’m bound away
Across the wide Missouri.
Dr. Boots' List
Interesting, not the lyrics I was familiar with. Wikipedia gives several variations.
ally
I’m sure it’s about the Indian chief. One of the verses goes, “O Shenandoah, I love your daughter …” Rivers don’t generally have children.
Charles Place
Which version? The one quoted below from Joe King or Bob Weir’s song? “Only a river’s gonna make things right.”
Joe King
Don’t forget Indian Lake by the Cowsills.
Dr. Boots' List
I did not know it, but now I do!
ally
Song of the Clyde …
Volga Boatmen …
There’s that poem by William McGonagall about The Silvery Tay, but I’m not sure if it counts as a song … I could compose a tune for it I suppose.
I’m sure I know loads of songs about rivers, lakes, lochs and tremendous puddles, but I haven’t had any coffee yet and my brain is a-fuzz. Might get back to you when I’m awake.
Dr. Boots' List
Excellent! Let me know what else you think of. This thread got so inspiring that I’m actually starting a list.
Jeremy Impson
Floating in the Forth – Frightened Rabbit
Rest In Peace, Scott Hutchinson
Dr. Boots' List
RIP, so sad. Saw him play in 2016 and had no idea it would be the last time. They were very good though, such a powerful catalogue
John Campbell
Dar Williams – The Hudson
Moe Lane
…I keep feeling bad for all of these other bands.
Tim
Don’t get me wrong I’m loving this but still wondering where the Beetles fit in. I guess there are revelations still to come.
maarvarq
Hear hear! Where is the immortal poet Pam Dylan? http://scarygoround.com/badmachinery/?date=20131212
The Tackleford universe timeline seems rather more than a bit fractured.
Joe King
Don’t try to make it all fit together. It’ll hurt your head.
As William Hurt said in The Big Chill, “Sometimes you just have to let art flow over you.”
destroyhistory
Written out of history in Crisis On Infinite Earths
David Wilt
“Fille de joie” synonyms: fallen angel, watery tart, moistened bint, good-time girl, Misguided Girl Guide, soiled dove.
destroyhistory
Soiled dove!!!!
Phil Masters
There’s probably a mandatory Monty Python link at about this point.
Rob Cottingham
I’ve soiled my doves more than once reading Destroy History.
Urbane Gorilla
Lady of negotiable virtue is good, too.